‘Young people just going to change pension age back later’

Satire, for now:

22-year-old trainee lawyer Tom Logan said: “This government telling us what’s going to be happening in 2063 is like a mayfly making big plans for next month.

“So if they’re in power until 2020 at the latest, and me and my mates get into government in 2040, that still gives us what, 20 years to change that back?

“Pretty sure we’ll manage it. It’ll be our second priority after legalising euthanasia.”

Treasury Secretary Danny Alexander said: “We cannot ignore the deficit, so the only responsible thing to do is to leave all our unpaid bills for young people who can’t get jobs.

“There is a slight risk that, when they’ve got all the money and power, the younger generation may act in their own selfish interest.

“But our society holds the elderly in such esteem that I think we can discount that.”