Convicted murderer Roy Hobbs said: “For my last meal this morning, I ordered two racks of barbecued ribs, seven pounds of home fries and a two-foot hot dog, all covered in bright yellow liquid cheese.
“So you can imagine my surprise when a suspiciously plump English dude arrives with a ‘four-grain summer salad’.
“If this is what the world’s come to, I’m ready to die.”
