5 Feet of Fury

‘The piece is about a poverty-stricken woman, and the only way to console her is through boning’

That is not White Guy problem solving. Our pallid wangs only cause trouble. We whip ’em out and it warrants trials, injunctions and search warrants.

No, boner-based healing is the exclusive realm of the black man. Which is why it took Otis Redding to truly understand this song, and he understood it so hard that it walked funny for days.

Also? Agreed: