5 Feet of Fury

Little women

James sends this link and asks:

Do you have any related advice for dating petite girls? Other than ‘PUT ME DOWN!’?”

Well, James, you’d be amazed how often we have to yell “put me down” when confronted by frat boy types, at least when we’re younger and thinner.

I can’t really top Megan’s list, but:

* There actually ARE jockeys in my family. The Foster women were all of normal height until my great-grandmother had an affair with an Edinburgh steeplechase dude, with predictable results. No, I am not joking.

* I only wear heels on occasions that don’t require me to walk very far. (Cough.) You’ll cope. (PS: occasionally “put me down” scenarios have their place…)

* Please don’t call me “cute”.

* I don’t shop in the boys’ department. Anymore.

* The weather down here is pretty much the same.

* Don’t lean (way) over to talk to me, especially if it requires you to do that vaguely creepy pulling-up-your-pant-legs thing.

* Don’t pat my head.

* Don’t sing THAT SONG.