Also? Whether it’s a lion or a little boy, the necrophiliac Left only cares about dead things.
Also? This is barely even satire:
“Like my last boyfriend, he will be pretty much ideal in all other respects of character and looks, but just have that one little thing which for some reason I absolutely cannot live with, like ‘stumpy teeth’.
“Then I will meet with my friends in a wine bar and we will all laugh uproariously about it and make up a name for him like ‘Mr Stumpy Teeth’.
“They will all share similar stories, and we will get drunk while enjoying how witty, glamorous and capricious we are, like characters in a glossy US telly drama called something like ‘Lady Lawyers’, except we work for a printer cartridge company.
“Then I will go home to a flat that is empty except for a cat, some furniture and a big print of Audrey Hepburn.”