‘Muse album cover sparks collapse of capitalism’

Protestor Nathan Muir said: “I’d always assumed that money and corporations and CCTV and stuff like that were probably fine. But then, on Saturday, someone showed me the cover art for Drones, Muse’s seventh studio album.

“I was just like, ‘woah’. My entire worldview was instantly flipped on its head, and I suddenly found myself beyond the looking glass.

“I went straight out to assassinate my local MP and torch the nearest Halfords.”

US president Barack Obama, who resigned this morning, said: “I am little more than a blinkered corporate marionette, and I have Muse to thank for giving me my life back.”