5 Feet of Fury

Remember: No one is ever ‘just kidding’

From the NYT, obviously:

For these women and my wife, there had to be the perfect confluence of events for sex to happen. My wife’s requirements were that her job had to be going well, the children didn’t need her attention, the house had to be clean, the temperature had to be between 76 and 84 degrees, and the Democrats had to control at least one branch of government. (…)

Her former parameters for sex also became somewhat more generous. Now she merely had to have a job, the children had to be alive, the house had to be standing, the temperature had to be between 0 and 104 degrees and the Democrats had to control at least one branch of government.