5 Feet of Fury

So I finally wrote about Bruce Jenner (over at Taki’s)

I can’t imagine the comments being too “JOOOO!”-y given the subject matter, but it’s early yet…

According to other information I’ve likewise managed to acquire, like mental burrs or lint, simply by not being comatose, Bruce Jenner’s role on these shows is that of a drone in a hive with multiple queens—a.k.a. Kris and her plentiful female offspring. The former Olympian occasionally objects, meekly, to his family’s extravagance or whorishness, but he’s laughed at or simply ignored. (See “tellingly,” above.)

Yet even if you were already wondering when it was that this onetime personification of alpha male athleticism let the queens cut off his balls, I doubt you ever imagined the day would come when vulgar metaphor would mutate into grotesque reality.

So I’ve been trying to ignore tabloid rumors that Bruce Jenner might be plotting a sex change.