5 Feet of Fury

Democracy! Whiskey! Donuts!

Remember ten years ago, when even otherwise intelligent conservatives and libertarians declared that, if only Muslims got a taste of sparkly Western commercialism and pop culture, they’d see the error of their terrorist ways and chill out and embrace American Idol and gay marriage and weed and never hurt us again?

They’d skip Friday night prayers for Friday night high school football, and we’d all go shopping together at the mall!

Forget the obvious if buzzkilling objection that, er, shallow, hollow, godless Kim Kardashian Kulture wasn’t something we should be encouraging anybody to embrace.

It’s sad but not surprising (because most of them are atheists or merely nominally “Christian”) that otherwise intelligent conservative and libertarian bloggers and pundits didn’t get that their evidence-free theory was just the flipside of the leftwing “why can’t we all get along?” multicultural coin, the same one they’d been rightly mocking forever.

Idealism comes in all ideological flavors, and it is always toxic, and usually fatal.

Behold, exhibit #73,966-A of “Libertarians Can Be Idiots, Too”!

Somalia-based jihadist waxes nostalgic about time in Toronto — and Tim Hortons

The Alabama man wanted by the FBI and indicted for providing support to one of the most ruthless Al Qaeda franchises has no regrets about his life on the lam in Somalia but misses his parents, his sister Dena and a few Western pleasures, including Tim Hortons coffee.

Omar Hammami writes in his online autobiography that he just wants three days to visit the all-American life he had before leaving for Mogadishu in 2006 and becoming one of the most recognizable foreign faces of Somalia’s war.

“After going through all the hugs and kisses, me and Dena would probably go running around town laughing our heads off and talking about a billion things without ever finishing a conversation about any of them,” he writes near the end of the 127-page document posted Wednesday.

“I’d like to make a round of the restaurants and get some Chinese food, some hot wings, some Nestle ice cream, some gourmet coffee, and a slew of other foods and beverages.”

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Of course, the “Muslim” this Toronto Star reporter is talking about is actually a Western convert, not a foreigner, so it’s not like he’d never seen a Dunkin’ Donuts before.

He’d been steeped in Western pop culture since birth.

How’d that work out?