5 Feet of Fury

Prepping your kids for a life of being drunk and stoned at two in the morning with only five bucks in your pocket?

Why are your children in public school again?

    At the invitation of the Jamaican Consulate, students at Driftwood Public School had the opportunity to spend the morning of February 23 with the Consul General of Jamaica, Seth George Ramocan. The Grade 5 students learned about the island nation and its culture as part of “Jamaican Patty Day.”

    Students, in the role of Junior Reporters from Room 207, were able to interview Mr. Ramocan and discuss the “Jamaican Patty War” of 1985, which they had previously researched. The “war” was prompted by several patty vendors around Toronto being told by inspectors with the Department of Consumer and Corporate Affairs that they had to change the name of the product and the packaging because it did not conform with the Meat Inspection Act and its definition of a “patty.”

This school trip “allowed them to have a deeper appreciation for Jamaican culture and contributions to society…

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Of course, Jamaican “culture” equals red, green and yellow Rasta dohickies — the Rastas are a disgusting religion, btw — shootings, drug taking, filthy hair and annoying music.

If there’s a Jamaican Taj Mahal or Mozart, do let me know.

And please do NOT email me and go “Michael Lee-Chin.” Because we all know everything he accomplished was achieved by his Chinese half.