5 Feet of Fury

I called it weeks ago: Adam Carolla is on next Celebrity Apprentice

You’re lucky I use my talents for good instead of evil.

UPDATE: Howard Stern Show expert adds…

George Takei has officially been announced as a member of the new cast, along with close Stern Show friends Dee Snider, Lisa Lampanelli and Adam Carolla. Also competing is 2008 Miss Universe winner Dayana Mendoza who appeared on the Howard Stern Show in 2009 and talked openly about her sex life and bowel movements.

Other cast members for Season 12 of Donald Trump’s reality show franchise will also star American Idol runner up Clay Aiken, model Cheryl Tiegs, racecar driver Marco Andretti and early 90s talk show icon Arsenio Hall.

Also rumored to be competing are singer Debbie Gibson, mob spawn Victoria Gotti and Lou Ferrigno, the Hulk himself.

UPDATE:  here’s the full cast according to Wikipedia (page modified today at 16:45)

So if Carolla gets fired from Celebrity Apprentice — if his temper gets the better of him, or he gets himself fired so he can go home  — I’ll switch to Snider’s camp.

I love Lampanelli and Aiken, but doubt they can win, although they will likely place highly.

Besides the money, Carolla is no doubt thrilled at the chance to tool around New York with Andretti.

UPDATE: you can see the results of the the pre-Celebrity Apprentice tooth-whitening below:

PLUS: if you can’t get enough on this topic, Superfan Giovanni has just posted Part 3 of his series “Adam vs. The Dentist.”

It is over four hours long.

Shut up.