5 Feet of Fury

“How did you deal the last eight years of your service being called a demon, a devil, Darth Vader, the most divisive?”

Part of it, frankly — some of the comedians at night — was pretty good. Pretty funny, that is. I got as big a laugh about it as anybody.

I remember Darrell Hammond on Saturday Night Live portraying me as a one-man Afghani wrecking crew living in a cave outside Kandahar, Afghanistan. I had on my chest a built-in machine that made me invisible to radar and brewed coffee.