• About Kathy Shaidle
  • Kathy Shaidle: Privacy policy

5 Feet of Fury

Kathy Shaidle's blog. Est. 2000

‘Canadian ad says women are like used cars’

April 11, 2011 By Kathy Shaidle

There seems to be some (yawn) controversy over this ad, even though many men worth marrying would (if you got them drunk enough to admit it) prefer to marry a virgin.

And many women wish they’d waited for Mr. Worth.

But if wishes were virgins…

Ladies, there is no easy solution to this problem. The pussy is out of the bag. So here is my simple formula for improved success, which is simply Helen Gurley Brown’s old advice but adjusted for inflation:

1. Add up the number in your head

2. Divide it by 2.

3. Got it? Now just say “5.”

In 2011, five is a perfectly “respectable” number from whatever end of the telescope you are looking through. Too low to be “hot crazy bitch who will wreck my stereo while I’m at work one day” but too high to be “clingy, tearful, soon-to-be-very-fat neurotic.”

More from my site

  • In a sane world, a talented writer like Andrea Harris wouldn’t need to have fundraiserIn a sane world, a talented writer like Andrea Harris wouldn’t need to have fundraiser
  • New York Times discovers strange new respect for laws, ethics and stuffNew York Times discovers strange new respect for laws, ethics and stuff
  • Today on Martin Luther King Blvd! *Today on Martin Luther King Blvd! *
  • So let’s kill low IQ principals insteadSo let’s kill low IQ principals instead

Filed Under: conservative blog

« Learning that Courtney Love and I wear the same size makes me feel better about myself
Am I the only one surprised that more black kids aren’t named “Dee-En-Ay” — especially after OJ? »

Archives

Copyright © 2026 · Magazine Pro Theme On Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in