5 Feet of Fury

I told you Drew Carey was too skinny — and other detrius while I wake up

Except that Drew Carey was never “fat”. I don’t get that at all. There IS such a thing as “husky”, dammit; it is not just something Sears came up with to sell extra clothes in the basement. He and Seth Rogen need to eat some sandwiches. I think it’s important to add here that women aren’t funny. They weren’t funny on the old show either. Just let it go.

PLUS: Monty Python predicted “furries” — I’m depressed that I never thought of this before. Monty Python predicted a lot of things. Unfortunately.

ALSO: “We hadn’t even landed on the goddamn moon yet, and here’s a straight-up (hilarious) rap from a guy known primarily as a comedian.” (I thought most people knew that “rap” came out of streetcorner, jive-talkin’, “yo mamma so fat” competitions, but oh well.)