5 Feet of Fury

Bull**** for a Sunday Afternoon

* From our, “yes, there really are people like this” file:

NEW 5+ hour podcast of old Loveline radio segments, lovingly spliced together from taped-off-the-radio-in-the-middle-of-the-night-in-1998 cassettes, by self-described “Superfan” Giovanni.

First up, members of the band The Flys talk about their dad, a renowned doctor who came up with astronaut food but gave up everything to drag his nine kids around the world, helping poor people, while, at the same time, pretty much inventing the sport of surfing.

Then Adam and Dr. Drew compare fart smells.

That’s just the first 30 minutes.

* I’m so old, I remember when Crash (2004) was Grand Canyon (1991):

Writer/director Lawrence Kasdan packed his 1991 film “Grand Canyon” with Big Questions. Why is there so much violence in the world? Is society getting much worse, much faster than anyone imagined? Who on God’s green earth would choose to live in the City of Angels? (…)

“Grand Canyon” never hides its out-sized aspirations. It puts them out on full display and dares you to mock them.

* “Top 10 Fates of the Golden Gate Bridge”

* John Hawkins is right, but leaves out one thing: being a movie star appeals to a woman over being a politician because being a movie star is easier, and women are lazy:

Here’s a radical suggestion: Our society values female sex symbols more than female leaders because THAT’S WHAT WOMEN VALUE. Put another way, most women believe that being Elizabeth Taylor is more likely to get them the things they want in life than being Geraldine Ferraro. They’re probably right about that, by the way. The world is a beautiful woman’s oyster.

On the other hand, power, influence, and leadership may have a certain appeal to women, but they’re primarily still male fantasies — and no wonder. If you’re as beautiful as Elizabeth Taylor, it’s entirely possible that you’ll be able to marry a congressman or senator and share in the rewards of his life without having to do the grinding, sometimes demeaning work that often comes along with being a politician.

If and when women come to the conclusion that it’s more rewarding to be Kay Bailey Hutchinson than Jennifer Anniston, suddenly you’ll start to see the percentage of women in Congress skyrocket. Don’t hold your breath waiting though or you’ll pass out even before you get to read the next sad, sad article about how “society” is somehow keeping women from getting their rightful due in politics.

* Where the theme from M*A*S*H came from — “6 Musicians Who Accidentally Crapped Out Masterpieces”

Also: when you’re feeling sorry for Little Richard for getting hosed out of millions of bucks by The White Man, remember two things:

One: he was an obviously gay, mentally deranged black dude who nevertheless survived life in the pre-Civil Rights South without getting lynched, so screw you Ragtime;

Two: Little Richard ripped off this guy first:

* Finally: feel free to continue to laugh at The Bell Curve at your peril