5 Feet of Fury

9/11 strawman, aged seven, dies of sarcasm inhalation

Hard to know what’s more troubling: this snarky fake obit — which features a liberal evoking Godwin’s Law after eight years of daily, straight-faced “Bush = Hitler” sputterings, along with lame faux outrage over the violation of an imaginary “taboo” — or the impotent yet VERY scary creeps in the comments.

There’s an obvious, humane and therefore incomprehensible-to-liberals reason that images of 9/11 are rarely broadcast, and it has nothing to do with some confused, sinister conspiracy theory: these images are deeply disturbing. I for one still find them upsetting and ultimately unwatchable.

Contrary to popular misremembered history, the Zapruder film wasn’t broadcast on tv the weekend of November 22, 1963. It was shown by Geraldo Rivera, in 1975.

Yes, there are tedious, even shabby, copyright/estate/”broadcast standards” (and ultimately, eminent domain) reasons, but the real one is simple: the footage depicts a murder. I don’t mean to sound glib but, even in our YouTube/Paul Bernardo/Saw/“Dear Sister” universe, that’s not something you see every day.

(The other night — over 40 years later — I caught this unique disclaimer on a new Discovery Channel documentary: “This program features graphic footage of the assassination of John Fitzgerald Kennedy. Parental discretion is advised.”)

Yes, it is really that gross.

Anyway, the more I think about it, the less clear I am about those liberal blatherings and flailings over at the Boston Globe.

Are they mad that 9/11 footage isn’t shown enough –or too much?

Are they just mad for the sake of being mad?

And why that protective baby blanket of sarcasm?

Would a straight post have cast this “big story’s” utter triviality into high relief?

The only thing that’s really obvious to any sane reader is how much — in direct defiance of their alleged hero’s famous warning — these people fear something they call “fear.”

They think they mean “irrational fear” and its allegedly sinister effect on those poor benighted idiot children in flyover country who exist mostly as figments of the city liberals’ fevered brains.

They can’t see the effect irrational fear is having on themselves.

What a twisted snake pit of reporting and response.

Someone should save that Boston.com web page as a historical document. Because in its own weird way –like ten seconds of grainy, shaky footage shot by a local tailor who wanted to try out his new 8mm camera on his lunch hour — it accidentally documents a kind of “death”.

Just not the one that writer and his commenters think it does.

“Back and to the left,” indeed.