“Why would a male stripper need a pole?”

Out of the mouths of TV judge show bailiffs…

One of the joys of unemployment: non-stop judge shows.

This morning one guy was suing his friend because he sold him a leaky boat, and they were going to make the boat into a “stripper boat”, which apparently is a boat on which stripping occurs. And the two guys were gonna be the strippers.

“We were gonna put in a pole and everything…” said the defendant.

Which led to the bailliff’s query.

Which was exactly what I had been thinking, too.

Sex has become so unmoored from basic biological reality now, so encumbered with novelties of questionable utility or origin — with drunken women pretending to be aroused by Chippendales even though their brains aren’t wired for such visual stimulation; men seeming to prefer obviously fake breasts to the real thing; already-pregnant women fretting that they don’t look “sexy” anymore — that people don’t even know why they do the things they do.