5 Feet of Fury

And then she rubs the lotion on herself?

Career tips for the modern gal:

Ladies, if you want your own talk show, get abducted by a dude named Wolfgang who makes you call him “Master” and keeps you in a dungeon for eight years.

Worked for this dame! 

PS: Germans are crazy.

PPS: No, I do NOT have Wolfgang’s number. Sheesh.