5 Feet of Fury

So let’s kill low IQ principals instead

I had very few teachers who were smarter than I was. Here’s another typical idiot “educator” for you:

If students knew enough about Irish-born satirist Jonathan Swift to parody him, it would be cause for celebration in most area high schools. Instead, it led to censorship at East Coweta High.

“Senior Justin Jones burlesqued Swift’s 18th-century essay ‘A Modest Proposal’ in the September issue of Smoke Signals, East Coweta High’s student newspaper

(…)

“Titling his piece ‘Another modest proposal,’ Justin suggested that the euthanasia of low-IQ students could alleviate the world’s woes. His essay and a critique of an East Coweta Princess beauty pageant by the paper’s managing editor Caitlyn VanOrden spurred a classic example of administrative overkill.

“Principal Derek Pitts impounded 500 undistributed copies of Smoke Signals and told the staff that he wanted more positive and uplifting stories. His overreaction effectively turned Smoke Signals into a free-speech crusade. Resigning her editing position in protest, Caitlyn has created a Facebook site about the saga and is organizing a First Amendment rally.”

Don’t panic, Caitlyn and Justin. High school will be over soon, believe it or not. Your principal doesn’t really matter in the larger scheme of things. He’s just another time-serving, cowardly bureaucrat. Alas, he won’t be the last one you encounter. Sadly, some of the ones you meet will be ostensibly on “your” side, and that feels even worse, but won’t happen for a while from now so you’ve got time to brace for it.

However, your only concern should be the very real danger of turning into this guy someday.

UPDATE: send in your “My Stupidest Teacher” stories to kshaidle AT rogers.com